Friday, July 17, 2009

EXCERPT!!!

I decided to post an excerpt from The Not-So Meet Cute today for a few reasons.

1. It's Friday.

2. I've decided not to give up on this manuscript.

3. I can't think of anything else to post.



Things to remember:

This is MY work. No, I'm not selfish, I just don't like people stealing from me!

I accept appropriate criticism. But I also feel like I'm making myself vulnerable by sharing this so don't be too mean!

Piper (MC) can read minds. Everything in italics are the thoughts she hears. It's written in first person.

Alright then, here we go. Piper and Simon are about to get in an argument...or are they?



The feeling of betrayal renewed. My mouth opened to say something, but I still struggled to understand why Simon had revealed my secret. My breathing had become shallow and my mouth dry.

“Let’s go to my room,” Simon grabbed my hand and led me up a flight of stairs. I followed blindly, trying to decide what to say to him once we reached the top.

The bedroom was small with blue walls. I spotted a box still waiting to be emptied from his move. There was still a lack of personality to the living space, but I could still imagine Simon sitting and doing homework at the desk, or restlessly sleeping in the bed.

I hesitantly perched on the edge of Simon’s bed, expecting him to sit on the chair across from me, but he slid next to me instead. A pensive look clouded his face.

“Now I wish I could be a mind reader,” he breathed.

“Can’t you tell what I’m about to say though?” I looked over at him with the same expression.

“Not when you don’t know what you’re about to say,” he responded, running his hand up and down my bare arm.

“Well,” I began, looking straight ahead at a wall, “nobody knows about my mind-reading except for you. Or at least, so I thought. I didn’t expect you to tell them, I guess.”

Abruptly, Simon stood up and started pacing around the room. “I thought our relationship was serious,” his hands ran thoughtfully through his hair.

“We are serious, Simon” I assured him. Then, bravely: “I love you.”

Simon’s path stopped. My heart stopped. The world stopped.

Everything was vivid. Everything confused me. Everything was him.

He held me. He kissed me.

He loved me.

“I love you too.”

“I love you too.”

“I love you too.”


His family didn’t matter anymore. He loved me. We kissed like we had never kissed before. With purpose.

4 comments:

sraasch said...

Aw, love scene! More, more! This is so adorable :)

Sarah said...

Such a cute scene. I like it! I agree with sraasch - more please:)

awwaggener said...

Cute! I love the last two lines especially--such a good summation and so gently poignant.

Mariah Irvin said...

Thanks you guys!